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Fear

Fear
What do you think about Fear? Is it good, or is it bad? I was thinking about this, this morning whilst sat on my balcony having my morning coffee. This emotion comes into play in so many ways, and in our everyday lives.  It is certainly something, which can hold us back, however it is absolutely necessary. Can you imagine a world with no fear?  I live on the 25th floor so I have a very nice view, however I would not jump off! The emotional driver behind my decision not to jump off is that of survival, and the fear of dying.  Even if I convinced myself that I could fly, I know that the fear would kick in and the survival mode of my evolutionary brain will do all it can to make me STOP. The point is the fear is the initial emotional response to events, which is designed to help us to survive.  By feeling fear we automatically respond in ways to make us STOP and pay attention.  This is why many people whom experience severe Fear, will FREEZE in a way that they cannot move.  This causes reactions all around the body, all which are designed to keep us SAFE. Emotional responses are immediate, and much faster than any reaction from the rational thinking brain.  I will not go into too much detail in this blog about how emotions work, as that is not the intention here, and would need far more detail. What I am more interested in is how you relate to Fear, and how you respond to it.  I believe Fear is an absolutely necessary emotional need for human beings.  However I also know that it can hold so many people back, from achieving their dreams. So how do you overcome Fear? First of all you need to understand that some emotional responses are natural, and not something that come by choice.  However some Fear’s will come from your thinking, and are feelings that you have created.  These are the Fear’s that you can and should overcome.  These are Fear’s that you are not born with; they are created from your thoughts and your experiences.  They have become your reality because you decided to hold on to them. Most often Fear comes from the “unknown”, when we are entering an area we are not familiar with, and when we cannot be sure of the outcome.  This is when you are stepping out of your comfort zone, or your familiar zone. For many years I had a Fear of Public speaking, and in fact even dreaded being passed a microphone at my own birthday party.  Now I prefer to speak in front of as many people as possible, and I absolutely love it! To overcome my Fear I first had to reprogram my thinking brain.  I was aware that my thinking was the only thing causing the Fear, and that it was just as easy to think about how great it was to be privileged to share my views, as it was to think about what could go wrong.  My rational analysis looked into what is the worst that can happen, and what is the best that could happen.  As you can imagine, there was no life or death scenario here! Then I looked more deeply into what I needed to do, in order to get the best outcome I possibly could.  When it comes to speaking, it is Preparation and Practice!  I did not expect to be the best speaker in the world, however I truly believed in what I wanted to share, and I knew that the ONLY way to...
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Take Responsibility and be a Hero

Take Responsibility and be a Hero
I would like to talk about something that I have realized is so important in all aspects in life.  It is something that I, myself have to remind myself of sometimes.  In fact I have had to remind myself of this over the last week. I have a fantastic support group, and am very lucky to be surrounded by likeminded people who continually help me to have the right mindset.  But when I say lucky, that was something I took action to achieve.  I realized that to get to where you want you have to be around people that want the same things, and have what you want.  I took responsibility for the fact that what I had done before, had not got me where I want. Everything starts in the mind, and the mind is a very powerful thing, which you have to continually be aware of, and to re program it with what serves you. I do not believe you will succeed in life, whether it is in business, or your personal life, if you do not take responsibility for your own actions (or indeed lack of actions). My friend and mentor, Mr Marco Robinson often talks about the difference between a “Hero” and a “Victim”.  A victim will use one of three things, shame, blame, and justification. What this means is basically they will find “reasons” and “excuses” for why they are where they are now.  A “Hero” will take full responsibility and will then take MASSICE ACTION to get to where they want to be. I have been guilty of this in the past there is no doubt.  I have been in a position of having everything, and also losing everything.  Now what is important is that you accept it and move forward to make it right.  It was not easy and it is much easier to get down, feel sorry for your self, and be a victim.  I certainly could have used all 3 of the above “victim” statements. However what you must do is take full responsibility that it is ultimately down to your actions as to why you are where you are now.  In the same way it is only you that can take the necessary actions to get to where you want to be. This is not easy and any sort of change always has a lot of fear attached to it.  I have spoken in a previous blog about “tests”.  These are things that occur to test you on your journey and this is the time when many people give up, or go back to what they were doing before. So the sooner we understand, that where we are today, is down to our OWN actions and where we will be is down to the actions and decisions WE are going to take, the sooner we can take the first leap to where you want to be. I am not just referring to the big picture, as this also applies in day-to-day things. For example in business, sometimes it is all to easy to blame staff, or others for why something was not completed correctly, or not delivered.  Now sure someone else may have contributed to this problem, but a hero will not view it this way. What a hero will do is to look into what THEY could have done differently.  Did they provide the right support, processes and training to help that member of staff?  Did they give the right instructions? Did they employ the right person for the job in the first place? They will basically focus on a solution to the problem, and try to make sure it is put right and will not happen again.  They will take MASSIVE ACTION to achieve this. They will not...
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Do you know your “WHY’s”?

Do you know your “WHY’s”?
It is Monday morning, and I have just worked straight through for the last two weeks including most evenings and the weekends. During this time I have suffered with the Flu, and also a nasty bug that was picked up from my trip to Bali. Do I feel sorry for myself? Do I want to “rest”? Well I would be lying if I said there has not been a little of that, and at times its been a struggle to first get up in the morning. However all I have to do is remember my WHY’s, and everything is back on track.  I remember WHY I am doing, what I am, and I know very clearly where I am going. When you discover this it is amazing.  It really is one of the biggest things I have really learnt over the last year or so. This is why it is also important to love what you are doing.  When you know your why’s you will learn to love, even the not so great bits of what you are doing, because you know it is a step to what you really want. Also it will enhance your life and energy levels, as you will know why you want to be happy, and how you choose to live your life. We all want more money, and of course money can help you achieve your chosen lifestyle.  But the real WHY’s will come much deeper than that and I would recommend all of you to spend time and really get to know what these are. One of my mentor’s Mr Robert D Hamilton has a fantastic book, which can really help on these matters, and help you find the spark in your life. I would definitely recommend it as a MUST read to everyone.  Wherever you are in your life, it can help you get to the next level. “Ignite the spark, explode your results” It is available in MPH stores, and other good book stores. You must have a vision of what you want to achieve, and then take steps to achieving this.  This is true, whether it is in business or in your personal life (or both). It is never too late to achieve your dreams, and as my good friend and mentor say’s “anything really is...
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